humor takes the edge off living

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intj-confessions
mycravatundone

a girl i know told me how a guy she knows once moved out from his parents, ate nothing but fries and meatballs for HALF A YEAR, and got scurvy. imagine the doctor’s face when this guy shows up with like his gums bleeding and the doc has to fucking say DUDE…. THATS SCURVY…. in this day and age

mycravatundone

this is turning into a “how a person i know got scurvy” thread and im so here for this, please share your scurvy stories if you have any

aquarianconstellations

the other day someone posted pics from the reddit page r/zerocarbs where these fools only ate meat and 0 vegetables or fruits and all the posts were about various symptoms of scurvy. i died when one literally read ‘i don’t want to start the vitamin C debate again but’

mycravatundone

THE VITAMIN C DEBATE

elidyce

My mother told me all about scurvy when I was five and trying to resist eating pumpkin and let me tell you it’s been 35 years and I still get nervous if I go for two days without eating a green vegetable. 

I told my own little picky eater about scurvy, rickets etc and now one of her most frequently requested lunch items is baby spinach, closely followed by carrots.

I’m not saying everyone should mildly traumatize their children to make them understand that vegetables are vital to ongoing possession of your teeth and organs, but.. no, that’s exactly what I’m saying. Go for it. 

ariadne83

some guys i used to know went on a boys only road trip. they decided they were only going to eat things they could cook on the engine block of the car.

two of them got scurvy. one of them drank so much jagermeister + red bull that he temporarily lost the ability to see in colour.

dexvoan

im sorry he what now

laughter-everyday
owlmylove

it’s officially impossible for me to fall in love bc last night at a party drunk-me remembered that sober-me had thrown 3 funsize kitkats into my bag with the explicit thought “drunk-me is going to be so excited when she finds these” and i don’t think any other person is gonna be able to love me like that

crocsuckersanonymous

but what did drunk you ever do for sober you

owlmylove

one time i blacked out and woke up to find 13 full sized rolls of ritz crackers in my bag bc drunk me is also an ideal provider

laughter-everyday
owlmylove

it’s officially impossible for me to fall in love bc last night at a party drunk-me remembered that sober-me had thrown 3 funsize kitkats into my bag with the explicit thought “drunk-me is going to be so excited when she finds these” and i don’t think any other person is gonna be able to love me like that

crocsuckersanonymous

but what did drunk you ever do for sober you

owlmylove

one time i blacked out and woke up to find 13 full sized rolls of ritz crackers in my bag bc drunk me is also an ideal provider